mars 04, 2020

Pregnancy, Loss, Rainbow babies and Sunshine

My BFP (Big Fat Positive). The latest and the last. It’s a long story...

I have been pregnant 9 times, including my current pregnancy. I have 2 healthy and wonderful kids and this pregnancy is going well. I am now on week 19 and everything is looking great.

I have lost 6 pregnancies at different times between 5 and 12 weeks and it has not been easy. It never is. But I have one rainbow baby to show for with another on the way - the middle baby, as you will read later, was the easiest pregnancy I could ever have dreamed of, as if none of the losses ever took place, or the fear or the doubts or the anxiety so lets call him a sunshine baby :-)

People have been talking more about pregnancy loss and there is a lot more information. When you have a miscarriage you quickly learn that many people around you have also gone through it some time or another. It is painful, it is hard, it makes you fear for things you did not even think were possible before and it makes you question and doubt and… Oh boy, it is tough.

But most people go through it and I have not met anyone that did not finally have a baby, one way or another. It may take longer. It may be with a different partner. It may be through adoption, IVF, surrogacy or whatever. But it happens. Despite what it may seem like when you are going through the storm, it clears, the sunshine comes and the rainbow appears.

I decided to write about it because I know that many people go through this and many people struggle. AND after all my struggles I fell pregnant AGAIN totally unexpectedly at age 43! It is true that I was not using any precaution. But we had been trying for 2 years with ovulation medication (because I was no longer ovulating regularly), OPKs (Ovulation Predictor Kits) and having sex on the two most fertile days of the month and it didn’t happen (well, two pregnancies with very early miscarriages, but I almost don't count those). So I really did think I was no longer able to get pregnant and I did not expect to get pregnant not trying, at this age. I actually thought that I had started early menopause… In any case, I since read somewhere that chances of getting pregnant at 43 are like 2%. But I presume that only includes people trying to get pregnant.

Here is an interesting article about getting pregnant after 40: https://donoreggbankusa.com/resources/blog/pregnancy-40-likelihood-risks-and-success-facts.

Anyway, in the upcoming posts you will read more about my story. The challenges I went through and the rainbows and sunshine that came my way also. I hope you like it. I hope you find it useful. And I hope to give you hope, if right now you can’t find it anywhere else…

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